VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
Randomize
