I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
Randomize
