My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
two words: eviction party
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize