You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
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