Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
It's shark week go big or go home
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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