just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
Randomize
