That's intense
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
Randomize
