my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
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