I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Randomize
