you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
go do what you do best...puke behind churches
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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