Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize