Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Randomize