Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
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