I have demons in me.
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
You need Xanax blowdarts
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
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