It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize
