People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
i wish my penis had a tongue
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
Randomize
