she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
Randomize
