let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
There's always time for handjobs
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
Randomize