It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
