Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
Randomize
