office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
Randomize