somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
