If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
Randomize
