so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Randomize