We're facebook friends in real life
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize