We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
organizing the empties. That sober.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
I'm always down for nudity.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Randomize
