Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
