***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Randomize
