that's an acceptable place to lick
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
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