I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
Randomize