can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
Randomize
