Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize