Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
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