Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
