8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
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