He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize