Make note: the first date is too soon to make the "condoms are only for making balloon animals" joke.
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Randomize
