i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize