was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Randomize
