Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
Randomize
