everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
Randomize
