My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
Little spoons don't ask big questions
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
Randomize
