were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
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