I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
Randomize