I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize
