god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
