yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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