Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize