i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
You're like the curious george of whores
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Randomize
