garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
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