no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Randomize